Wed. Nov 25th, 2020

We’ve put together 36 points that you’ll understand if you come from South Armagh. Here they are:

1. You or someone you know were in ‘The Ra’.

2. You could have made the County team if it weren’t for ‘The oul drink’.

3. You would rather talk about the price of Cattle/Sheep than the news or weather.

4. You would rather talk about the price of land than the news or weather.

5. GAA is your real religion.

6. You took great pride at ‘The Sniper At Work’ sign at Ford’s Cross.

7. If you’re a man you have an elaborate and expansive selection of check shirts.

8. Dealer boots are a part of your cultural identity.

9. You look at people from Newry with a strong sense of suspension and contempt.

10. You laugh at people who pay for real green diesel.

11. You’ve never paid full price for a packet of fegs in your life.

12. You’ve lost your virginity in Lacey’s/NV or Blaney.

13. You’d love to meet Willie Frazer in his own with no cameras about.

14. You whisper when you mention the name ‘Slab’.

15. GAA club or county gear is your everyday choice of attire.

16. You prefer the smell of pure manure than the smell of a city.

17. Your summer is built around collecting grass.

18. You learned to drive a tractor before you could LEGALLY drive a car.

19. Driving licence? No need sure, it will be grand.

20. You get excited when you see a new tractor or other farming equipment.

21. You probably have a Subaru jacket.

22. Your Ma goes into Newry once a week for ‘The big shop’.

23. A good ‘mug of tay’ would sort out all problems.

24. You don’t care if you’re on antibiotics. You’re fucking drinking anyway.

25. Your Ma always has a decent plate of spuds ready for your dinner.

26. You’re not buying a house. You’re building one.

27. You don’t mind being stuck behind a tractor ‘sure, he’s only getting from A to B’.

28. You’ve owned at least two Garth Brooks CDs.

29. There’s a Sacred Heart portrait on your wall. If not, there was definitely one on your granny’s wall.

30. You remember exactly where you were on the 22nd September 2002.

31. Wakes are an opportunity for a good cup of tay and sandwich.

32. You’ve been to the funeral of someone whose name you didn’t know.

33. Drying clothes out on the line is still a thing.

34. You despise England in everything. Even in Eurovision you want them to get 0 points.

35. Just down the road is really about a 5 mile trek.

36. Beaure, Fein, Rulya, Munya are everyday words.

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