Wed. Dec 2nd, 2020


A Newry teenager has been kicked out of the Magnet Centre and shunned by his peers for openly discussing his love for Nathan Carter.

Local wobbly head Darren ‘Cut Me’ Quinn was speaking openly at the centre for social outcasts and weirdos when he let it slip that one of his favourite songs was Waggon Wheel by Nathan Carter.

Darren spoke to Newry Spud from Boots chemists where he was buying razor blades and said:

“I just let it slip that I really like Nathan Carter’s music. I love all the other weirdo shit like Radio Head, Nirvana and My Chemical Romance but I dabble in and out of Irish country too. Next thing I know I’m being kicked out of the centre and told never to come back.”

A spokesman (or it might have been a woman) for the Magnet Centre told us:

“We tolerate pretty much any shit music in here but Darren had the cheek to mention Nathan Carter’s name. In the same sentence he also mentioned the name of our God and Saviour Kurt Cobain, that’s when we snapped and fucked him out. Bloody weirdo.”

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