“Ugly” Newry Man Takes Human Rights Action

A Newry man has embarked upon a landmark legal crusade to the European Court of Human Rights after a woman refused to go out with him “because he was an ugly cunt!”

The 37 year-old man, Peader O’Hallion claims he was discriminated against after the woman, who cannot named rejected his advances in Cobbles citing his hair (none), weight (twenty-one stone), height, (Five feet, two inches), nose (snubbed) and eyes (beady) as the reasons why she would “not be seen dead with him on a cold day in hell.”

Mr O’Hallion told Newry Spud:

“This is just another form of racism, I see myself as the Martin Luther King of ugly lads. God knows, this is Newry after all, there’s fucking loads of rare looking yokes about baah lol.”