Tue. Jan 19th, 2021

A Teleperformance staff member who lost his voice due to Coronavirus was today euthanised by the company we can reveal.

The man who has been an employee of the call centre for 3 years simply couldn’t answer the calls for at least a month as he has to self-isolate and rest so he was ‘humanely destroyed’ according to the company.

A Teleperformance spokesman told Newry Spud:

“Firstly we would like to send out our condolences to the man’s wife and 4 children at this awful time. However, he couldn’t answer incoming phone-calls for at least a month so, naturally, we thought the only safe and sound way to deal with him was to inject him with a cocktail of deadly drugs. Tragic for us all really.”

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