Fri. Jan 22nd, 2021

The PSNI have arrested a 19 year-old woman who works in Monaghan Street’s Friar Tucks we can reveal.

The woman is thought to have been caught stealing coleslaw to sell on the black market Newry Spud understands.

A Friar Tuck’s spokesman told us:

“We are devastated to learn that a young employee has for some time been stealing our coleslaw to sell on the black market across the world.”

The PSNI told us:

“At present Friar Tuck’s coleslaw is worth more than gold on the black market per metric pound. This young woman has been living a lavish lifestyle selling it to Eastern European crime lords and Saudi Princes. It could cause serious financial difficulties for Friar Tuck’s.”

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