St Catherine’s Band Conductor Wins “Egomaniac of the Year” Award


A Newry man has won the First Ever “Egomaniac of the Year” Award held at a packed Canal Court Hotel last weekend.

Noel Mathers who is the conductor of The St Catherine’s Band spoke to us from his Armagh Road home last night and was quite underwhelmed with the award saying:

“Once I was nominated, I knew the rest had absolutely no chance of winning and only Collette had put an extra sheen on my bald head and polished it with a chamois I wouldn’t even have bothered going to collect it-even though I would have missed another photo opportunity so I was obviously going to go like.”

Noel who likes to also be addressed as ‘Mr Noel (Glorious Leader) Mathers’ was not the only person in for the award, a close runner up was Mr Declan Mc Chesney of Cahill Bros who told Newry spud:

“We had no chance for fuck sake. Everyone knows that Noel has the World’s biggest ego. It was a foregone conclusion. We just came for the free meal and drink.”