The Shelbourne Bakery on Hill Street is known for its specialty in baking cakes for all occasions but they have found themselves in hot water after a customer got the shock of her life when opening a cake she got baked for her 40th birthday.
Claire Fat-Ankles told Newry Spud from her hospital bed in Daisy Hill where she is recovering from shock:
“I came home and thought I’d have a wee slice before my party as I just couldn’t wait to be honest, it was about 4 minutes since my last meal, anyway, the cake looked lovely apart from the bit calling me ‘Fat Hole’. I just thought it was a disgraceful way to treat a morbidly obese lady like myself. I’m now in hospital as I took a slight stroke when I saw the insulting remarks on the cake, but I ate the whole thing so I have no evidence for the police for fuck sake baah.”
Hugh Boyle from The Shelbourne Bakery told Newry Spud:
“It seems one of our staff thinks they are a fucking comedian, a full and thorough investigation has been launched internally.”