Wed. Nov 25th, 2020


Savage’s shop on Monaghan Street has come under pressure to remove new sweet vending machines aimed at children selling sweetie ‘Heroin’ and ‘Cocaine’ we can reveal today.

The novelty sweets come in bags similar to those that are for sale in real life terms and look identical to both illegal substances.

We spoke with a Savage’s spokesman who told us:

“We want to reflect the very real life presence of these drugs in Newry so we thought we might as well start aiming it at the children of Newry now at this young age so they can at least get a taste for it.”

But anti-drugs activists from Sinn Féin (who smoke marijuana nightly but that’s ok because it’s not really drugs, or something) have hit out at Savage’s and have said they will protest outside the shop this weekend telling Newry Spud:

“We haven’t had anything to protest lately and so in that regard we are going to protest against these most awful sweet vending machines selling fake coke and heroin to children.”

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