Sat. Dec 5th, 2020

Children that have been bold this year in the Newry area will not be getting a bag of coal instead they will get a full pallet of wood chip burning pellets.

The move has been made after Santa has seen the sham of a mess Arlene Foster and co in Stormont has made of the recent heating system initiative.

Santa told Newry Spud:

“This year all the little shites will be getting a full pallet load of these woodchip heating pellets, it saves me on coal money; it’s better for the environment and at the rate of this heating scandal the pellets will be worth fuck all.”

A Stormont official has confirmed that the scheme with Santa is going ahead to see how many pallets of these useless fucking things he can shift in the greater Newry area.

Please follow and like us: