Prince Charles is to be sent to Bessbrook to ‘self-isolate’ after being tested positive for Covid-19 Balmoral has confirmed today.

The heir to the throne tested positive last night for the deadly disease and he has expressed his wishes to ‘go somewhere the people don’t really matter’.

A Balmoral statement read:

“Prince Charles will be sent to Bessbrook in the border region of Northern Ireland. We will send him there in a two pronged strategy. The first part is that the good country air will help clear his lungs and the second part is that he will infect the unwashed peasants in Bessbrook so we kill two birds with one stone if you will.”

Meanwhile Sinn Féin’s MLA Liz Kimmins who was once engaged to Prince Harry has confirmed she will be visiting Prince Charles later tonight for supper.