Sun. Jan 24th, 2021



brokehand

A Newry woman was admitted to Daisy Hill Hospital late last night in what has been described as a ‘domestic incident’ we can reveal.

Jenny SlippyFingers who was engaged in the act of love making with her husband Paul managed to slip a finger ‘where the sun doesn’t shine’ and suffered a broken hand for her trouble.

Jenny told Newry Spud:


“I was just trying to spice up the sex life. I thought I’d surprise him but he wasn’t into it at all and when my finger was in he jumped and he broke me fucking hand.”

We spoke with husband Paul and he told us:

“She’s lucky I didn’t throw her out the fucking window pulling thon stunt. Christ on a bike.”







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