Newry Woman Returns ‘Faulty Fanny Pads’ Claims The ‘Wings’ Don’t Fly


A Newry woman sparked a security alert in Dunnes today after starting a fight with staff over what she described as ‘broken fanny pads’.

The PSNI were called to the scene after the woman who cannot be named for legal reasons brought back used sanitary pads and claimed they were ‘faulty’.

When the shocked staff asked how they were faulty she complained that the package said they had wings but no matter how many times she threw them out the window they wouldn’t fly.

A spokesman for Dunnes told Newry Spud:

“Obviously the lady was either deranged or just thick as pig shite. She didn’t get the concept of the ‘wings’ on the pads, we hope she is now getting the help she needs.”