Thu. Feb 25th, 2021
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There’s widespread shock and anger across Newry and South Armagh today after it became apparent that after all the marching and singing rebels tunes Ireland was still not free of Britain.

Thousands of disappointed chuckys across the community have said they will go out today on the drink to ‘give it another go’.

We spoke with a high ranking Republican who told us:

“To say we are disappointed doesn’t come close to be honest. I’ve a fucking hangover from hell after the rake of pints I put away yesterday.

Today is a new day and we’ll try once more to rid ourselves of the cruel heavy oppressing hand of British imperialism. Though, hopefully it doesn’t work my DLA is due tomorrow.”

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