Sat. Nov 28th, 2020

Newry retailers have been granted extraordinary powers in a bid to stem the Covid-19 pandemic we can reveal.

From Tomorrow all shops open to the public will be given a cattle prod to ‘encourage’ people who refuse to wear masks in their premises.

The Newry Chamber of Commerce & Trade’s President Emma Mullen-Marmion who helped bring the move into legislation told Newry Spud:

“Clearly this is a last resort and we would encourage retailers to use the cattle prod only when absolutely necessary. Obviously it is totally up to the retailers discretion and to be frank if some customer is wearing a mask but is being a bollox then just go for it and shock the shite out of them.”

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