plumber

Legendary Newry porn film ‘Debbie Does Derrybeg’ has been banned in Newry for portraying plumbers as people who turn up on time.

The film, which features Declan Patton as The Plumber, was made in 2010 by the now defunct Newry porn company. But the Newry, Mourne & Down Council has taken the unprecedented step of banning the film, as it features a scene where the plumber turns up at a woman’s house when he said he would.

Newry, Mourne & Down Council spokeswoman Joanne Smyth told Newry Spud:

“In this day and age, when young people are so susceptible to things they see on telly, we thought it right and proper to remove this film from the public domain. We can’t let our children see this kind of thing, letting them grow up thinking that a plumber will turn up when he says he will. The days I’ve sat in waiting for the arsehole to turn up. It’s just not on. We need to think of the children.”

But critics have pointed out that the film will now go underground. Newry porn fan Dave Armstrong said:

“It’ll go underground now without a doubt. Gang wars will pop up as they try to ship illicit copies of the film and the Council will see that it’s a short-sighted solution.”