Thu. Jan 28th, 2021



Newry people who post photos on Christmas morning of their children’s crazy amount of presents to symbolise their own wealth are cunts we can reveal.

A new study carried out by Newry Spud has found most of these parents who post photos of their children’s gifts laid out carefully on their couch that is still on tick from DFS don’t actually talk, touch or communicate with their children for the other 51 weeks of the year.


Santa Claus even broke with tradition to speak out against the phenomena telling Newry Spud:

“Well I’m pretty fucking annoyed to be honest. I have built up a reputable and credible reputation of being responsible for giving these kids gifts. Now because of Facebook Newry parent think they can send inappropriately timed photos saying ‘Santa was here’ fucking dick heads. They are wrecking my reputation. It’s becoming a ‘who has the biggest dick’ competition now.”

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