Newry Man Tony ‘The Wand’ McGivern Named ‘Most Fertile Man In Ireland’

A local man has been proclaimed as ‘the most fertile man in Ireland’ we can proudly proclaim.

Tony ‘The Wand’ McGivern a lifelong Newry man was ratified as the most prolific man in the sheets not only in Newry but indeed in IRELAND.

One local man Anthony Rafferty a part-time drone operator who asked not to be named told us:

“Tony tries to model himself on 80’s porn star Ron Jeremy. It’s all a bit of a rouse really, he’s like Ron Jeremy when he grows thon little moustache but he doesn’t have Ron’s magic meat sausage. He’s more of a cocktail sausage man.”

However Tony told us:

“This award is up there with the time I came second in the Bit & Bridle pool competition. Kieran Hanna beat me 5-0 in the final using a mop handle as he forgot his cue.”