underwear




A man from Newry has had his underpants surgically removed after he had worn them for 11 consecutive years.

Brian Fatspatrick underwent the procedure after his wife threatened to divorce him if he didn’t change them.

Brian told Newry Spud:

“They were my comfy ones so I liked to wear them every day. But then after the hot weather yesterday, my wife Sheila went apeshit on me, telling me to change them. It was only then that I realised that my knickers had become attached to my body. Sheila called an ambulance and a few hours later, they were finally off. It’s a shame really because I considered them my lucky ones.”

Wife Sheila was relieved that her husband was finally free of his underpants.

“I bought them for him back in 2005 and he’s worn them every day since. They had a massive hole in them and his bollocks were hanging out of them like a bag of plums. I’d like to thank the staff at Daisy Hill Hospital for all their help.”

Sheila is now planning a trip to Primark to buy Brian a new pair of underpants.