Wed. Dec 2nd, 2020



An unfortunate Newry man has claimed it’s easier for him to get his hands on a gun than get a ride we can reveal.

The 27 year old loser has tried everything to ‘get a yoke’ but to no avail.

We spoke with the man and he told Newry Spud:

“I simply can’t get a ride at all baah. I’m trying everything humanly possible. I’ve been going to The Marine and even the monsters in there turn me away.

I’ve EVEN went to the Mourne Country Hotel for the GILF action. Not even a desperate 76 year old would look at me. I could get a fucking AK-47 easier baah.”

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