Immigrant workers in south Armagh to get recognition

EASTERN European immigrant workers on South Armagh’s mushroom farms are to receive official recognition in a bid to improve their working conditions.

“By reclassifying our slaves as ‘cattle’, we’ll receive grants to feed and house them,” explained Crossmaglen farming spokesman Pete Burns yesterday, while parking his Range Rover outside his 8-bedroom house in the South Armagh hinterland.

“We’ll also receive proper compensation if they die, instead of having to dump their bodies in a ditch somewhere and letting the council sort it out.”

“Farmers want to treat our slaves with dignity,” added Mr Burns, “as long as it doesn’t cost us a penny.”