The government revealed today that the small and backward little village of Hilltown did not have to turn their clocks back last night as they are already about 80 years behind the rest of civilized society.

The small village is famous as it is exclusively made up of idiots.

One such idiot from Hilltown told us:

“Thanks be to Jaysus we don’t have to turn our clocks back any further than we already are. We hear of thon fancy things in Newry like the inter-web and them things you can talk into and people far away can hear you, tele-something they call them.”