Fri. Jan 22nd, 2021


Friar Tuck’s has installed scales at their counter in order to stop overweight people from buying their food we can reveal.

The scales are in place to show customers what they weigh and it is hoped it will make more customers opt for salads and water instead of chicken burgers, super chips and Coke.

A Friar Tuck’s spokesman told Newry Spud:

“We believe we are in the front line in fighting obesity in Newry. We put the sales at the counter in order to shame the fatties from buying our ridiculously high calorific items. If they are over a certain weight for their height, age and sex, we will refuse them service.”

But a spokesman for FON (Fatties of Newry) told Newry Spud:

“This is an outrage and must be condemned by all right minded people. We as fatsos have every right to eat what we want, when and where we want. To fat shame us so publicly with scales built into the floors at the tills is humiliating and hurtful.”

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