With the Westminster election creeping in around the corner we will be looking at the local Newry & Armagh hopefuls standing throughout the next few weeks.

To start this series off we thought we’d ask the question on everyone’s lips ‘Who to fuck is Martin Kelly & what To fuck is Aontú?’

We spoke with Mr Kelly who told us:

“I honestly haven’t a fucking clue what Aontú is or what I’m doing standing for election. I was asked to stand for Aontú and thought to myself ‘fuck it; sure I’m doing nothing else’.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s more chance of The Beatles reforming than there is of me being elected but sure, it might be a good bit of craic.”