Thu. Nov 26th, 2020

A south Armagh farmer was arrested in Primark today after he ‘became excited’ at the selection of dealer boots on offer it’s been reported.

78 year old Peadar ShitKicker from Cullyhanna removed his penis and began to put his member into the boots.

One terrified lady who was an unsuspecting onlooker told Newry Spud:

“I was in buying a new bra and I saw the old man placing his enlarged beef sword into the dealer boots. He kept shouting ‘Dealer Boot Porn’ it was quite disturbing.”

The PSNI has confirmed they arrested a 78 year old man on a charge of outraging public decency.

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