Thu. Jan 28th, 2021

A local Independent Councillor from Newry has become the unlikely hero today when he made a surprise visit to Washington DC to help calm the riotous situation outside the houses of democracy.

Gavin Malone made the trip using his contacts within the American Embassy and Irish foreign office and was given an extraordinary diplomatic visa.

Speaking from Washington Councillor Malone told us:

“When I saw the scenes around the houses of world democracy I was both shocked and appalled in equal measure. I called my contacts within the White House and was asked to come to the scene with immediate effect.

I brought along what in my mind is the healer of all evils, a box of Milk Tray and a small box of plants. When I got to the scene I gave the leader of the riots the box of Milk Tray and his flower box and he immediately called the riots off.”

Meanwhile it has been revealed that Councillor Malone is now being asked to be an intermediary in talks between Palestine and Israel.

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