Tue. Jan 19th, 2021

Newry Spud’s investigative team have been deep undercover inside the Newry, Mourne & Down District Council for 8 months and our findings are shocking.

The revelations come after the Council had the bare faced cheek to erect a ‘Christmas Tree’ on Hill Street that resembles a dying hedgehog with a few bits of tinsel threw over it as if in a last ditch effort to show it some form of compassion in its death throws.

The reason behind this year’s farcical ‘Tree’ was because their Christmas party was of such extravagance it would put a Russian Billionaire to shame.

Our undercover source Noel Pepper who wishes to remain anonymous told us:

“The party this year was beyond over the top. We had pole dancers & I don’t mean dancers from Poland either.

On one end of the room I saw Sinn Féin’s Mickey Ruane smoking Cuban cigars while talking to the SDLP’s Kate Loughran who was drinking whiskey made from the tears of Newry’s poor.”

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