Sat. Jan 16th, 2021

Rumours coming from Stormont today are suggesting that Finance Minister Conor Murphy alongside First Minster Arlene Foster have organised a successful piss up in a brewery we can confirm.

Despite letting the hospitality sector crumble day by day by inept inactivity the two politicians are thought to be ‘absolutely dying’ after getting full drunk at an organised drinking session in an unnamed brewery.

One Stormont source told Newry Spud:

“We can confirm that both Conor and Arlene had a great drinking session in a local brewery. We are all shocked that they managed to organise this feat despite the relative ease of if given their track record of disastrous governance.”

Meanwhile local hospitality workers and owners are wonder what to actual fuck is going on.

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