The sleepy village of Bessbrook is to become Ireland’s first legal Red Light District the Newry, Mourne & Down District council said today.

The area will see prostitutes being able to ply their trade ‘in or around Bessbrook village’s from 8pm to 3am 7 days a week without fear of arrest or prosecution.

David Edgar from Bessbrook Alliance Legalise Love Society or (BALLS) told Newry Spud:

“It’s a great initiative giving local prostitutes the chance to earn a decent living without fear of being lifted by the PSNI.

Of course they will be taxed for this freedom and the Council will take 30% of all their earnings. So essentially the Council are their pimp in a way but sure, it will bring in enough money to pay for their Christmas party this year.”

It is thought the regulars at the nearby Trainor’s Bar at Dans on the Green Road and the locals in ‘The Pitt’ are ‘overjoyed’ at the decision.