Sat. Jan 23rd, 2021

The entire village of Newtownhamilton has been sectioned under the mental health act it has been revealed.

The small backward village has always been a place looked upon with deep suspicion by the outside world.

At an extraordinary meeting of the Council it was decided that the whole village would be held under the mental health act for at least two weeks in order to let specialist doctors into the area to inspect the native residents.

Local Sinn Féin Councillor Barra Ó Muirí told Newry Spud:

“We’ve had to make the tough decision to section all of Newtownhamilton. It’s a well-known fact that Newtown is full of loony-bins and this was the only option open to us in order to protect the good and decent people of Newry from possible harm from these local savages.”

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