Sat. Jan 23rd, 2021

Tomorrow will mark the 50th year of the most extraordinary event in humankind, that of putting a man on the moon.

Commander Neil Armstrong and lunar module pilot Buzz Aldrin, both American, landed the Apollo Lunar Module Eagle on July 20, 1969, at 20:17.

Despite this massive feat of human endeavour you can still not get a mobile phone signal in the small village of Camlough.

A NASA spokesman told Newry Spud:

“We spent decades and billions of dollars figuring out the logistical ways in which we could put a rocket with humans on it to the moon but we can’t quite figure out how to get a signal for cellular devices in Camlough.

We in the business refer to Camlough as a type of Bermuda Triangle. Signals sometimes get in but for fleeting moments, perhaps only seconds. We also don’t like going there for research as the locals are very unwelcoming.”

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