Lad Pretty Sure He Can Turn Lesbians At Pride To Love Penis

A local straight guy is very excited about the Gay Pride event tomorrow in Newry we can reveal.

Peadar O’Hallion has boasted to friends he will attend all the events and parade in an attempt to ‘turn the lesbos into dick lovers’.

Despite all his mates telling him he hasn’t a chance he has insisted that he’s going ahead with his mission to ‘cure the poor girls’.

Peadar told Newry Spud this morning:

“I see this as my duty as a straight lad to turn the girls who think they like other girls. Maybe they are just into threesomes or some shit so I might get a crack at a few three ways which would be a bonus. I think I will do well to be honest.”

But one friend of Peadar told us:

“I think as a general rule, lesbians tend to enjoy being with other lesbians. Not horny 25 year-old guys who think they can ‘turn them’ to dick.”