Armagh Observatory has stunned the scientific world by discovering signs of life in Burren. Before today’s extraordinary breakthrough it was believed Burren was completely sterile.

Speaking at a press conference in The Canal Court Hotel scientist Paddy BlackHole said:

“We’ve detected a faint orange glow near Burren, indicating hot air and possibly even methane emissions.

“However I must stress that Burren can only support very primitive life, and we would urge outsiders to stay at a safe distance.”