Camlough Painter Talks About His Work Like He’s Pablo Picasso

19th November 2018

A painter and decorator from Camlough spoke about his recent work as if it holds some sort of artistic merit we can reveal. John ‘Butler’ O’Hagan who operates ‘John O’Hagan Decor’ actually thinks he’s a modern day Pablo Picasso or Salvador Dali. Speaking to Newry Spud O’Hagan said: “Yeah, there’s an art to cutting in […]

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Newry Granny: “Growing Up In Newry Worse Than Syria Is Today”

19th November 2018

A Newry granny talks about her childhood in Newry like she was growing up in modern day Syria we can reveal. Lizzy McGinn from Newry makes a point of telling all her grandchildren about the hardships she had to deal with growing up in Newry as a child. One of Lizzy’s grand kids told Newry […]

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Dog Runs Out In Front Of Lorry After Owner Puts On Nathan Carter CD

18th November 2018

A local dog has run out onto the road in front of a moving lorry on purpose this evening after his owner put on a his Nathan Carter CD it has been revealed. Nathan Carter from Liverpool has sent his condolences to the dog and his owner in a heartfelt tweet today. The dog’s owner […]

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NSPCC Called As Mother Returns Home With Ned Kelly’s For Dinner

18th November 2018

A 12 year-old Newry child has called the NSPCC after his mother returned home this evening with a Ned Kelly’s carry out for dinner we can reveal. The child made the harrowing phone call when he discovered his mother didn’t get a Friar Tucks as promised but instead came home with a Ned Kelly’s burger […]

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Burren Man Still Rocking Cool Water Like It’s 1994

18th November 2018

A Burren man still wears Cool Water aftershave we can reveal. Ciaran ShittyBootts believes he’s still current and ‘hip’ by wearing the aging aftershave that reminds most over 30’s of regret and bad decisions. Ciaran told Newry Spud about his fragrance choice saying: “I love Cool Water. It has always stood by me through the […]

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Kellogg’s Cornflakes Release ‘Marty Bogroll Santa’ Christmas Box

18th November 2018

World famous breakfast cereal makers Kellogg’s Cornflakes has released a special edition box that has the Buttercrane Santa Claus and Newry celebrity Marty Bogroll on the cover. The box of the favourite cereal will be available from all Newry shops from Monday 28th November until 5th of January. Speaking at the launch of the special […]

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Mayobridge Like Stepping Into 1900’s TV Show Peaky Blinders

17th November 2018

Going to Mayobridge is like stepping into the TV show ‘Peaky Blinders’ we can reveal. The TV show set in 1900’s Birmingham is a massive hit in the starring Cillian Murphy as head of the Blinders Tommy Shelby. But it has been revealed that a visit to Mayobridge is like walking onto the set of […]

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Calls For Calm As Saoradh Place Union Flag Over Newry Sinn Féin Office

17th November 2018

The PSNI has called for calm in Newry after Saoradh An Iúir mounted an overnight attack on the Sinn Féin offices by placing a Union flag over the building. The move is seen as a slight by the Saoradh party claiming that Sinn Féin are as British as Finchley. Saoradh An Iúir spokesman Stephen Murney […]

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Around-A-Pound A Treasure Trove Of Useless Shite

17th November 2018

Newry’s Around-A-Pound is an absolute treasure trove of useless shite you’d never need it has been revealed. The shop on Hill Street is jam packed with useless photo frames and cheap deodorant. We spoke with an Around-A-Pound spokeswoman who told us: “From the outside, this place might not look like much but if you’re willing […]

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Shock As Coulter & McCartan Take Over Armagh Management

17th November 2018

Armagh football fans have been left reeling today with news that Down legends Benny Coulter & James McCartan have taken the reigns as the new management team of the Orchard County. The news was broke in an unusual fashion with the Armagh County Board opting to showcase the duo wearing the new 2019 county jersey. […]

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